White Fragility 12: Where from here?

We come to the final chapter of White Fragility: Why It's so Hard for White People to Talk about Racism, by Robin DiAngelo. The book has been good for me to read. I have agreed with the vast majority of the book. If you compare my reviews to the chapters themselves, you will get a sense both of how I might present the truths of the books and some of the questions I have had.

Previous Posts
Introduction
Chapter 1: Challenges of Talking Race
Chapter 2: Definitions--Racism and White Supremacy
Chapter 3: Racism after the Civil Rights Movement
Chapter 4: How Does Race Shape the Lives of White People?
Chapter 5: The Good/Bad Binary
Chapter 6: Anti-Blackness
Chapter 7: White Triggers
Chapter 8: The Result: White Fragility
Chapter 9: White Fragility in Action
Chapter 10: White Fragility and the Rules of Engagement
Chapter 11: White Women's Tears

Chapter 12: Where do we go from here?
1. I think it might be helpful to start with her approach to herself. Because she defines racism as a feature of white culture that is as much a matter of impact as intention, "I don't see my efforts to uncover how race shapes my life as a matter of guilt" (149). "I don't feel guilty about racism." This might be a surprise to some of her despisers, but it reinforces her basic claims.

She never directly says, "All white people are racists" in the book. She comes close in a couple places, and probably she would not object to the statement. It probably would be more palatable for others to put her position this way: All white people benefit from and participate in racism. Racism, she would say, inevitably shapes my life as a white person.

What might I feel guilty about? I would say the choices I make in relation to my role in those racist structures. She does not believe any of us who are white can ever fully remove ourselves from this racist bias. "Rather, I strive to be 'less white'" (150). "To be less white is to be open to, interested in, and compassionate toward the racial realities of people of color."

"The default of the current system is the reproduction of racial inequality" (153). As white people, "we must never consider ourselves finished with our learning." "It is a messy, lifelong process" (154). "I will never be completely free of racism or finished with my learning" (147).

I might mention that she does not find the move of developing a positive white identity a possible goal (149). For example, I prefer to identify myself as English, Dutch, German, and Scots-Irish rather than white. She does not consider this adjustment beneficial because, in her view, it obscures my inevitable identity as a "white" American. If I do not look at that aspect of who I am, I will simply be falling into the color-blind trap.

2. She does suggest some helpful strategies for a white person wanting to improve the racist situation of our culture. First, in relation to other white people.

• First, "try to point the finger inward, not outward" (150) when approaching another white person on issues of racism. There is always the danger of thinking myself the one fixing the racism in others without acknowledging my own problems. "I try to affirm a person's perspective before I share mine." 
• This of course doesn't work on the racially tone deaf. I received some condescending racism advice from some self-righteous ignoramus on Twitter the other day. I at least have some self-knowledge. He apparently did not.
• Second, give yourself some time if you aren't quite sure what to say in the moment. I'm assuming she is talking about when a white person is in a more private conversation with another white person rather than when you are in a public situation with people of color.
• In the end, "niceness" will not improve the situation. White people must show courage to address racism as it shows itself.

With regard to our friends and acquaintances of color, if you have said or done something that has negative impact with regard to race or embodies racism

• First, process the situation with another white person who shares this quest. It is not the person of color's duty to take care of your feelings or reassure you.
• Ask to meet when you are ready, tell them why. If they don't want to meet, deal with it.
• Own your racism. Don't make excuses. Don't say, "if..."
• Ask the person of color what you have missed in your understanding of the situation.
• Make a commitment to do better?

3. Good responses to make:

• I appreciate this feedback.
• This is very helpful.
• This is hard, but also important.
• I have some work to do.
• more are mentioned

4. Adopt assumptions like these:

• Forget the question of whether you're morally good or bad. This quest is about impact.
• Recognize that racism is multilayered in our culture.
• White people inevitably have blind spots on racism.
• Authentic antiracism is rarely comfortable.
• The antidote is action.
• I bring my group's history with me. History matters.
• Racism hurts people of color.
• White comfort maintains the racial status quo. 
• more are mentioned

5. Ways that these assumptions interrupt racism:

• minimize our defensiveness
• show our vulnerability
• allow for growth
• interrupt internalized superiority
• build authentic relationships
• more

As a Christian, I believe I must love my neighbor as myself. I also believe that inner strength doesn't feel the need to defend itself. It only fights when it is good for the other and in the rare time when it is right to protect itself.

I can take critique because I am interested in what is true and in what is right. Racism is all too real. If I am to err, let me stop erring on the side of myself.